Gulal – review

I don’t write reviews … this is probably my first review … but when I saw such a bad response from audience for such an exceptional movie, I couldn’t resist.

I am not an Anurag Kashyap fan, I enjoyed Dev D but I was not awestruck as I was by this one. It’s a movie which reaches to your brain and squeeze it so badly that either you can’t stand the pain and quit or just enjoys it till the climax.

I don’t know about Rajasthan, but spending my teenage in MP, I’ve seen how filthy college politics could be. I could so relate me, you, any one to Dileep Singh played by Raja Chaudhary. That is what exactly happens to many bright students who are just there to study but ultimately end up loosing themselves, just because they get sick of being called fattoo.

And there is one name which should be praised more than Mr. Kashyap for the movie, and that name is Piyush Mishra. He is the Music Director, Lyricist and Actor in the movie. There’s no doubt that songs of the movie are outstanding and have been placed so perfectly it carries the tension and mood from the beginning to the end.

Gulal is pleasant break from the usual ha ha he he ho ho cinema. I would strongly recommend this movie for two and a half hour of tryst with reality.

Movie Tagline… !!

Well, was jobless enough…

 

Superman returns

To get new pair of red underwear

 

Batman begins

Same shit again

 

I know what you did last summer

Your vet told me everything

 

It’s a wonderful life

After your death

 

Apocalypse now

Lunch later

 

To kill a mockingbird

Send it to negotiate with the dean

 

Saving private ryan

For public

 

Some like it hot

Specially when served in bed

 

On the waterfront

Your chances of drowning increases

 

Once upon a time in America

There were people with brain now there are Bushes.

 

Mr. Smith goes to Washington

And realized he is in wrong simulation of the matrix

 

Kill Bill

All rights reserved by Hillary and Monika

 

Life of brain

Filled with twist and turns

 

V for vendetta

X for xrrr Y for you moron!! Z – Zuck off!! Lets start with 1,2,3 now

 

Children of men

Oh yah! Men are having children and Cows are flying

 

American Gangster

Indian Politician

 

Grind House

Take my grinder

 

Twelve Monkeys

Lives in my wing

 

Bride of Frankenstein

Every one has after two years of marriage

 

Pirates of Caribbean

Have their successors in Lok sabha these days

 

Extra terrestrial

Has a beard, wear a cap and is a nasal singer

 

The Matrix reloaded

Out of ammos eh?

 

The Incredibles

Me and my …

 

The day after tomorrow

Will become ‘tomorrow’ tomorrow

 

The mummy

And dead (dad)

 

Gone with the wind

And never came back

 

 

What women want?

Who knows better then me…

 

There is some thing bout Mary

Is she a he?

 

Planet of the apes

Is where MJ came from?

 

PS: – a PS saying there is no PS…

Hindi Movies – B

When cinema was introduced in India in 1896 who would have thought it will thrive to become biggest film Industry in the world. India accounts for 73% of movie admissions in the Asia-Pacific region, and earnings are currently estimated at US$2.9 billion. 877 feature films and 1177 short films were released in the year 2003 alone, In contrast, 473 films were produced in the US in 2003.

Informally, movies made in India are classified into three categories (other then genre) A, B and C grade. So, what is the difference b/w them?

Well, I guess every one knows what A-grade movies are, so I’ll directly jump to the diff b/w B n C.

1. B-grade movie has at least one main stream actor, but C-grade doesn’t.
2. B-grade has better actors then C-grade.
3. Better editing.
4. Continuity in the story.

Well these are the few points, and I m sure there must be more.

Here I m going to talk specifically Hindi B-grade movies.

Ingredients of a B-grade movie:-

If you are an aspiring film-maker and can’t afford to loose you money, then read these few lines carefully.

1. You need to know the popular genre. What is in demand?
2. No matter what the story is do add few scenes displaying woman anatomy.

History of B-grade movies: -

HORROR :

As far as I remember, in the beginning most of the B-grade movies were Horror.

After the success of Ramsay brother’s, every one jumped into making such movies. Though, ramsay tried their luck in main stream, but didn’t taset success (except the their success full horror series Zee Horror Show).

movies like Veerana

darwaza

saamri

were milestone of this genre.

This was the time of late 80’s and early 90’s, most of the B-garde moives were horror.

JUNGLE

Then came the time of Jungle movies… it was early 90’s and horror flicks were loosing their charm. Then movie like “Taarzan” and “jungle ki beti” were the life saver

And thats how we got a new theme for such movies.

these movies were perfect. low budget(can save on males clothes too ) , wide possibility of skin show no tension of story too.

This was the time when C-grade movies came into existence, most of the horror flick of this time were utter crap, and hence placed under C-grade.

MITHUN

Mid 90’s, again a breeze of fresh air in the B-film industry, brought by our very own Mithun Da. The one man army, the Rajnikant of B-grade Bollywood movies,

dikhne main bevda

chalne main ghoda

maarne main hathoda…

there are so many of them ….

movies like gunda

Loha

Kaaliya

were just the tiniest show off of his greatness.

Not only Mithun but other main stream actors tried their luck but no one achieved his heights.

It was a common saying among the producers that time:- if you have about 5 lac bucks and will to make a movie, take next train to ooty. Rest all, Mithun will take care of.

Meanwhile C-grade movie producers got a new funda for their movies, Dacoit. Though there were few B-grade Daaku moives too, but majority of them were C-grade.

SEX

The new millenium, B-grade film industry saw a drastic change in the base of story, now there was just sex, nudity, double meaning dialogue all in all, the only ingredient which actually make the movie sell.

But unlike previous movies these genre was lead buy the ladies …

like Megna Naidu, Sherlyn(Mona) Chopra, Monalisa, Payal Rohatgi etc. These are the few names who tried to find a way to main stream from B-grade moives… some succeeded some still trying.

This time C-movie industry, caught up with B, and made numerous such movies.

So this was a glimpse of that part of Hindi film industry…

At the end i can only say … “to appreciate something good you need to taste the worse”. that’s all

PS:- Posting after a long pause…

PS:– My PC is working now …. yhe … Indian jugad zindabaad

PS:— Song of the week – Dum laga – dil dosti etc.

PS:—- Finally playing Half life-2 …

PS:—– Quote of the month :- “One more day wasted … still a virgin”